


The road trip

by Zoya113



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: F/M, Just as a treat, Melissa speaks in vine references, Trapped in a car with someone you don’t want to be trapped in a car with, i can have little a escapism, just guys being dudes, no real plot just guys having fun, tried to emulate just hanging out w friends?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:34:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22829515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoya113/pseuds/Zoya113
Summary: Melissa has to drive Ted and Paul out of town for an important conference. Emma is there too
Relationships: Emma Perkins/ Paul Matthews, Paul Matthews & Melissa
Comments: 12
Kudos: 60





	The road trip

**Author's Note:**

> This was more just a good vibes type of story there’s not too much important plot

“Good morning!” Came Melissa’s all too cheery voice for 8AM. “Come children, welcome to my car,” she was leaning out her rolled down window to greet Paul and Emma as they trudged over to her car.

“You say children like you aren’t ten,” Ted snorted from her passenger seat.

“I’m eleven so shut the fuck up,” Melissa whipped back around to retort. 

“Wow!” Paul raised his voice a little louder than his usual volume. “Melissa‘s first swear of the month.”

“What?” She unlocked the child locks so Paul and Emma could get into the back seat. “It’s like the vine. You know?” 

Melissa’s car smelt like a strange mix of strawberry and old take out food. It was only ever just slightly too warm for comfort from sitting out in the sun all day, but it was cosy. 

“I don’t have a photographic vine memory, Melissa. That thing shut down ages ago,” Ted shrugged, knitting his brow. 

“What else can I say besides yikes? You two know the one I’m talking about right?” She turned around in her seat to peer at the couple over the back. 

“I mean, maybe I’ve seen it before?” Emma exchanged a look with Paul as if he could confirm it but he was closing the doors again. 

“Wow. Didn’t know I was friends with a bunch of grandmas.” Melissa pulled her car into drive again to roll out of Emma and Paul’s driveway. “Ready to go?” 

“Yeah. Let’s get this over with,” Ted rubbed his forehead, arching his back and sinking down into his seat. “If this is the shit you do for a raise then maybe it isn’t worth it.” A nine hour drive to give a shitty stock presentation with clearly all of his best friends here. Why couldn’t Charlotte have come along? At least that would make doing this all for free a little more worth his time.

“If you complain like that for the whole trip you can drive yourself to the conference,” Melissa patted her hands on the steering wheel to the timing of her indicator. “Come on guys, we’re going on a road trip!” She tried to get them all enthusiastic. “There’s a fun road trip vine too but you guys aren’t cool enough to get it, huh?” 

Emma stuck out her tongue. “Sorry, guess I was too busy having a life,” she rolled her eyes as she clicked her seatbelt on, leaning up against the window and feeling the vibrations buzz through her bones. “I like your air freshener,” she commented. “What scent is it?” 

“Uh, strawberry, but it isn’t working right now,” Melissa glanced up at it where it dangled over her rear view mirror, bouncing as they went over a speed bump.

“Oh but it’ll come back later?”

“Yeah, it’s just taking a break,” she played along, chewing on her tongue as she tried to find a lane to pull in to. “I’ve got to get a new one.”

“You’ve got a lot of stuff going on back here, Mel,” Emma crossed her legs up on her seat to keep her legs out of a miscellaneous pile of rubbish and dirty clothes. 

“Oh yeah, sorry, just toss it over the back,” she told her nonchalantly. “I’ve been meaning to clean it up but I haven’t had a second.” 

“Oh, is this my jumper?” Paul had a questioning tone as he pulled his grey hoodie out from under the pile. “I thought I lost this.” It needed a wash, it was covered in crumbs and lint. 

She shot a look over her shoulder to confirm it for herself. “Yup. You left it at my apartment ages and ages ago. I’ve been meaning to give it back but I guess I forgot?” 

“What are you so busy doing that you can’t clean up this mess?” Ted picked up a recycled bag of what seemed like nothing but scrap fabric. “Who is this for?” 

“I’m busy chauffeuring my lovely co workers plus Emma to a conference obviously,” she scoffed. “Guys, stop bullying me for my car.”

“Haha, messy car Melissa,” Emma mocked, pointing an accusing finger. 

“Ah!?” Melissa squealed a little too loudly, her voice breaking as she gripped at the steering wheel in surprise anyone would disobey what was a clear order. “Keep that up and I’m turning this car around and leaving you behind!” She bit back. “Just throw it over the back!” 

“So you can forget about forgetting about it?” Paul questioned as he helped Emma gather everything off the floors. “You see this is the problem, you’re a hoarder.”

“Am not.” 

“I’ve seen your bedroom. You collect the weirdest things and you never get rid of them.” He examined what seemed to just be a rock. Not a decorative rock or a crystal or anything, just a rock. “this is a rock, Melissa. A whole rock in your back seat.” 

“Oh! Hand it here,” she stuck a hand back over the seat. “I was walking mew to the park and she liked it so we brought it home, I just forgot to bring it inside.” She tucked it into her blazer pocket as Paul clapped it into her palm. “And I’m not a hoarder! I firmly believe that the idea you have to get rid of plush toys once you’re an adult is a capitalist scam. They’re my friends, Paul.”

“Mm,” Emma elbowed Paul. “That’s pretty rich coming from you. He will not let me do anything with his card collections.” She grinned at his reddening face and he batted his hand off her.

“Well you are an adult Mel, how many stuffed bears do you need?” Ted teased.

“Oh now I’m an adult? Five minutes ago I was ten- eleven actually, so shut the hell up.” 

“Ooh didn’t swear that time,” Emma noted, leaning back into her seat and running a thumb under her seatbelt as it rubbed against her neck.

Melissa exhaled, keeping her eyes on the road for a few seconds, constantly flicking between the car in front of her and the map. “Ted, can you plug my phone into the aux?” 

“Oh my god, no,” Paul groaned, leaning forward to try and grab Melissa’s phone away from Ted. “You skip every second song, we aren’t listening to your music for the whole drive.” 

“She’s driving, she gets to pick the music,” Ted stated. “Unless you want to drive through peak traffic for the next couple hours,” he gently reminded him. Ted was not coming out here for free if he had to listen to Paul’s song list again. 

“You’re picky with your music,” Emma chimed in, mostly to herself. “What, you wanna subject everyone else to the tron soundtrack babe? Are we gonna have to put on your Mr blue sky playlist huh?” 

“Don’t make fun of me, your music taste is even worse,” he retorted. 

“Keep fighting and we’ll listen to Ted’s music,” Melissa chided. 

Defeated, Paul slumped back into his chair, looking for his own headphones. 

“Man. Okay, I’ll just put on my discovery weekly, that way you can’t blame me for anything that shows up,” Melissa declared, unlocking her phone for Ted. 

“Eyes on the road!” Emma waved a hand. 

“I am!” She promised. 

Paul was bracing himself for a very long ride. He would have lost it two minutes ago if Emma wasn’t coming with him. At least she made it a bit more tolerable. Emma didn’t want to come at first, but he had been dreading it so long he had managed to whittle her stubbornness down. An almost nine hour trip to do a shitty powerpoint all for free? Trapped in a car with Ted? And as much as he loved Melissa, she was definitely meant to be taken in small doses. 

“Klopfer dobos,” Melissa suddenly spoke up. 

“That’s the name of my ikea wardrobe,” Ted sighed, too tired to even ask for the context. 

“No, that building up ahead,” she tweaked her glasses like maybe she was reading it wrong. “Does it actually say klopfer dobos?” 

Paul took out one headphone. “Huh?” He glanced around until Emma pointed out what they were all looking for.

“Yeah. What do you buy at the klopfer dobos store? Any bets before I google it?”   
Shuffling her weight onto one thigh to get her phone out of her back pocket. 

“Exercise equipment,” Melissa started. “I’ll buy your lunch if I’m wrong.”

“It’s gonna be some weird kitschy art place,” Ted gestured with his hands. “Like a hand made crafts thing.” 

“Office building,” Paul betted. “What does it say?” 

“Ah,” Emma clicked her tongue, locking her phone and slipping it back into her pocket. “No results. So guess that’s just a fucking ghost building or something. Literally zero results. So, mystery.” 

“Phew. Close call. Thought I’d have to actually pay up,” she wiped her forehead. “Speaking of which, Ted, you owe me ten bucks don’t forget that.”

“Hey, Ted owes me ten bucks too!” Emma pointed out. “For the time I brought you a chai iced tea even though it wasn’t on the group order.” 

Ted crossed his arms and Emma glared at him in the rear view mirror. “The mirror is making your face look dumb from this angle.”

“Nah it just looks like that naturally,” Melissa quipped back with such focus on the road it was almost hard to tell she was joking. 

Traffic was slow, any movement was mostly made up of Melissa switching into a faster lane but it never got them anywhere. The main road was full of Hatchetfield citizens making their way to work. They weren’t going anywhere fast. It was a good thing Melissa rounded them up an hour early. They were barely at the bridge yet, and it was peak hour traffic. 

“Ahh look at that,” Ted pointed out the front window. “No wonder we’re going to slow. Road work ahead.” 

Melissa jolted, biting down on her lip. 

“Is everything okay?” Emma leant in between the front seats to ensure nothing was going wrong with the car.

“Oh yeah, it’s all fine, I just, I sure hope it does,” she dug her teeth into her lips, her face going red but a slight smile tugging at her lips. 

“What does?” 

“The road,” Paul answered, taking out one headphone. “I sure hope it does.” 

“Is that some sort of inside joke?” Ted questioned, but no one answered. “Oh, it’s another vine. I get it. Jesus Christ.”   
———————————————————

“Pull over here,” Melissa yawned even though she was the one driving. “Drive through, what do you guys want?” It was getting late, and Melissa was clearly quite sleepy. 

“Let’s just buy twenty dollars worth of chips,” Emma suggested, licking her lips but not looking up from her phone. “Have you guys ever wanted to do that?” 

“That’s basic human nature, sweetheart,” Ted rolled down his window, filling the car with a cold breeze and the smell of cheap fast food. 

They pulled into the line of other roadtrippers getting a late night dinner, waiting for their turn.

“I love you guys very much,” Melissa spoke up after a moment of silence from the group. 

“Aww, love you too,” Emma managed to get in first. 

“Are you going to kill us?” Ted said. 

“Oh, that’s nice. Where’s that coming from?” Paul ended last after needing a second to process that.

“Ummm,” Melissa indicated as she rolled forward. “My mouth.” 

“Yeah, didn’t you hear it?” Ted pointed. 

They stopped talking just in time to hear the worker call through the speaker to take their orders. They ate their shitty, greasy food in the parking lot, only pulling the windows up when it started to rain. The paper bags got tossed into the back along side the rest of Melissa’s mess. “I was so tired I nearly paid them with my cat’s rock,” she picked up the rock to put on her dashboard along side all the novelties and capsule toys. 

“Well I mean that’s pretty priceless,” Ted licked sauce off his thumb. “If they didn’t accept that rock as a form of payment we were gonna have some problems.” 

“Yeah, her cat’s gonna come beat up this minimum wage worker,” Emma added, definitely testing the limits of her still-on-despite-being-parked seatbelt by trying to lean on Paul’s shoulder. 

They sung loudly and off key (although no one seemed to mind) to the only song they all knew on one of Melissa’s playlists, aptly titled ‘vibing songs i can play w the gang’ but Melissa was done driving for the day, and the singing just made her more exhausted. 

“Paul can you drive the rest of the way,” she mumbled, closing her eyes so Paul would not argue with her. “You can play your music.” 

He sighed, but he had been sitting in the back all day and Emma was going to go off at him if he refused and let Melissa keep driving while she was half asleep, so he got out of the warmth of Melissa’s car and into the rain to take the front seat from her. Sliding into the front seat right besides the heater was nice though, and he could hear that slight humming as he dried off from his two second walk through the rain. He plugged his own almost-out-of-charge phone in, but didn’t play any music because both of the girls in the backseat were falling asleep he also didn’t want to risk playing his music next to Ted when he was in bullying range. 

Melissa slipped down in her chair to the point her head was almost on the lumbar support. She crossed her legs and rested them against the headrest of Paul’s seat which he could feel because it pushed him forward. The blanket she had tugged our from the back draped over her waist, but Emma had taken the rest of it.

“Do you not have bones?” Ted took one look at her before averting his eyes. 

“Gay people do be sitting funny though,” she answered in a mumbled and sleepy voice, a chuckle seeping through her closed lips. 

“Just get some sleep before the conference,” Ted was leaning his head against the seatbelt himself, trying to nod off.

“Hey man. The conference is for you guys.” Ted was supposed to give the talk, Paul was supposed to run the computer doing the visuals. “I’m just supposed to stand there and look pretty,” she grinned. “And Mr. Davidson is paying me for it, baby.” 

Emma let out a grumble, clearly trying to sleep. She didn’t even have to come on this long drive, she was just coming to take the free buffet food. Paul had also heard talk that she was planning an alter ego, pretending to be whoever she pleases because no one knew who she was this far from Hatchetfield. 

He turned on the windscreen wipers to finish off the drive, listening to the way the car tumbled and squeaked and the rhythmic beat of the indicator. The passengers of the car were silent, shortly after Emma and Melissa had definitely fallen asleep. 

Ted squinted, jolting awake all of a sudden and exchanging a horrified look with Paul. “Wait, Melissa’s getting paid for this?”


End file.
